Miscellanea Exotica

So, I took my SCM final this morning, and was absolutely shocked to discover that I actually knew what the fuck I was doing. Kind of a new and exciting feeling when it comes to my accounting classes.

Also new and exciting is my new-found enthusiasm for Sam/Castiel. Well, not so much new-found, really. I've been fond of at least the idea of the pairing ever since the angel first made his appearance. It's just that, until 5x14, what little interaction Sam and Castiel had was distinctly hostile, and until 5x18, Castiel has always been entirely too focused on and taken with Dean for me to be able to really buy him with Sam. However, I found Castiel's big scene with Dean in 5x18 (you know the one) to be cathartic in the extreme, and my affection for the angel currently knows no bounds.

And, I may have read With Nothing (Left) Up my Sleeve by fakeplasticsnow, which was utterly awesome, and really let me believe that the pairing is plausible post-5x17.

Finally, I had an odd dream last night. It took the form a fic, and it began like this:
( Cut for embarrassing silliness )

So Big Bang season is coming. I've seen hints of what various authors are planning, and I want to try to keep track of the stories that I'll be wanting to check out. I mean, obviously, I'm going to have a more complete list when the summaries are posted in May, but a) I'm impatient; and b) summaries don't always catch my attention. So, yeah, this is kind of a convenient place to list a few authors to keep an eye on in the months to come.

fleshflutter
lazy_daze
aggybird
xela_fic
clex_monkie89
maraceles
sonofabiscuit77
bellatemple
poor_choices
rei_c
toxica939
ysbail
vorpalblades
memphis86
mystic_reader
kiwiana
maybe:
mediaville
quasianpride
lesson_in_love
tryfanstone
42footprints
surevesta
silver_slashes
immortal_jedi
peppervl
hay1ock
wutendeskind
sweet_lyri
by_starkiller
missmaverick

More to come, probably. And, of course, I'll likely end up with an entirely different list when the summaries come out and I find out what some of these authors are actually doing, and how many of these authors actually finish.

Well, perhaps I'm drunk on non-concentrate apple juice. It's heady stuff.

List of SPN pairings in my order of preference:

• Sam/Ruby


• Sam/Jess


• Sam/Lucifer


• Sam/Gabriel


• Jess/Ruby


• Sam/Dean


• ...


• ...


• ...


• ...


• Sam/Lilith


• Sam/Azazel


• Dean/Jo


• Dean/Hogwarts' Giant Squid


• Dean/Anna


• Dean/Castiel

I may biased.

I'm okay with that.

Back from the accounting test tonight. Damn income taxes, pension plans, and stock option compensation to hell. But mostly income taxes. I feel like my head exploded and my brain is currently splattered all over the classroom floor. The person typing this is actually the mindless zombie that once was me. Why did I want to be an accountant again?

Urgh. Anyway.

So, I'm having a bit of a crisis of conscience.

I don't read RPF. I do not read RPF. Ever. Just the thought of it creeps me the hell out. I don't judge the people who enjoy it, but RPF in any form is just my one, absolute, no-exceptions, bulletproof squick. I can't even make myself read the summaries, I'm that uncomfortable with the whole thing.

And yet. I find myself tempted. I can't help but wonder if it might not be alright to read massive AU RPF, where there's basically no real relationship between the real people and the characters in the story. You know, where the characters might as well be completely fictional, and only the names and maybe the personalities are based on the people, and the story makes nothing even remotely resembling an attempt at portraying reality.

I just. I know that there's a ton of quality RPF out there. A lot of authors that I really enjoy reading in SPN have, over the last year or two, largely jumped ship over to RPF. There were, I think, more J2 Big Bang stories this year than there were Wincest, other slash, gen, and het SPN fics combined. Several were by authors who, I swear, I cursed aloud when I found out they were doing RPF rather than SPN. I'm sure many of these stories are very good. I'd like to read them. But I am made so uncomfortable by just the idea.

I dunno. There are stories -- lots of stories -- that I'd actually really like to read. They're massively AU. They're by authors that I absolutely adore when they write SPN. I know in my head that there really isn't anything wrong with reading RPF at all. I just find it so creepy.

*sigh* I have such empathy for the folks in SPN fandom who're squicked by incest.

I think I've just talked myself into dipping my toe into the RPF pool. Let us pray that this is not a slippery slope. Because, I'm sorry, but it's just so creepy.

And to top it all off, I have Beyonce's "Single Ladies" stuck in my head. Perhaps I should take it as a sign and just get drunk. I think I'm going to bail on class tomorrow, anyway.

( ...but like he did so long ago in Jericho, God just made a wall fall down. SPN 5x04 )

Now, bed. Cause I stayed up to download and watch and then write this, but I'm starting not to be able to understand what I just wrote.

I've been reading fic. It's left me so upset, my stomach hurts.

I may be a little emotionally volatile just now. Everything considered, I don't think anyone can blame me.

If I'm going to be upset anyway, I'd rather concentrate on the totally trivial shit than the horrible fucking real stuff. Just about anyone could take lessons from me on avoidance. Although, it's not like there's anything to be done about it now.

Life really kinda sucks.

( SPN 5x01 )

In non-story related news, how annoyed am I that I have class until 9 on Thursdays this semester? THIS annoyed. And this was not helped by the Steelers game being on at the same time today. (And I forgot to wear my jersey! I got on the bus this morning, and everyone was wearing a jersey, and I realized I'd totally forgot to wear mine! It's a Roethlisberger one. I love it, and I forgot to wear it, and I feel like a really bad Steelers fan. Oh well. They won, anyway, even without my psychic support. And dude, how cool was it, driving home, and looking out over the bridge, and seeing Heinz Field all lit up?)

And now, the question becomes, to sleep, or not to sleep? I have to be awake in about four hours, and I'm not sure it's worth it. My life is filled with such difficulties.

So, for Sweet Charity, I bid on two authors: legoline and ninhursag. I got my fic from legoline (Reflections of that Other Life) a while ago, but just yesterday got my fic from ninhursag (Such Friends Are Dangerous).

I just thought I'd post my squee about both at the same time. And oh, such squee. Time travel Sam! Jess=Ruby! It's no secret that Sam is my favorite character in... well, actually, he is, for the moment, my favorite character in anything. It's also not a secret that Sam/Jess and Sam/Ruby have shot to the top of my list, pairing-wise. Also, I may just perhaps have a huge kink about characters who have changed a lot over the course of a story being explicitly compared to their earlier incarnations. So, yeah. S4!Sam having a conversation with S1!Sam? Hit me in all the right places. And combining Sam/Jess into Sam/Ruby? I'm not actually sure that there is anything more awesome than that.

Such awesomeness. And it is all mine! Mine!

Y'know. Insofar as anything posted publicly to the internet is anyone's. Ahem.

:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D